Listener Robert Eagleman created this photoshop wonder for us!
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Sarah came to work very teary-eyed today. When Chainsaw said good morning to her, she burst into tears! It took her awhile to calm down and tell him what happened.
While she was driving to work in the dark this morning, a huge spider dropped down from the ceiling of her car - right in her face - next to her eye. She couldn't pull over right away, so she tried not to freak out until she could safely exit the freeway. She said it's two front legs opened up to a "V" while the other six legs were behind it. Sarah was sure this meant it was going to attack and kill her.
Somehow, she made it to work okay, but plans on letting her husband search the car for more spiders, eggs and cobwebs.
That's when Dave reminded us he use to have tarantula's at his house a few summers back. Yikes!
Photo by Getty Images
WE PLAYED A FUN ROUND OF THE "EMBARRASSING MOM’S" GAME TODAY! THE WINNER GETS FREE TICKETS TO SEE OZZIE!
JASON - MOM GAVE AN INTERVIEW ABOUT HIM IN BOOT CAMP CRYING HIMSELF TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT, WHICH RAN IN HIS LOCAL NEWSPAPER THE WEEK HE RETURNED HOME. AND IT WASN'T TRUE!
DENISE - OUTED HERSELF. HER KIDS WENT TO TORREY PINES HIGH SCHOOL & SHE’D DROP THEM OFF AND YELL OUT THE WINDOW AT THEM - MAKE GOOD CHOICES, MOMMY LOVES YOU,
JEN - SHE AND HER SISTER WERE HAPPY THEIR MOM STARTED DATING AGAIN. BUT THEN THEY FOUND OUT SHE WAS SENDING OUT NUDE PICS TO RANDOM MEN. JEN KNOWS THIS BECAUSE SHE AND HER SISTER BOTH RECEIVED NUDES FROM MOM THINKING IT WAS ONE OF THE MEN SHE'D BEEN TALKING TO.
JAMES - HIS PARENTS TOOK HIM ON A TRAIN FROM OR TO DISNEYLAND WHEN HE WAS 10. THEY STAYED IN THE BAR CAR WHILE HE SAT IN HIS SEAT NAPPING. SOME RANDO STOLE HIS PILLOW SO HE TOLD HIS MOM. MOM IS THREE SHEETS TO THE WIND BY NOW AND SHE STORMS INTO TRAIN, GRABBING THE FIRST MAN SHE SAW WITH A PILLOW, HIT HIM IN THE FACE AND TOOK IT BACK. TURNED OUT - IT WAS THE WRONG DUDE.
STEPH - MOM DRESSED UP FOR WORK WITH PANTYHOSE AND NO UNDIES SO WHEN SHE FELL DOWN ON HER HANDS AND KNEES SHE SHOWED HER GOODS TO EVERYONE IN THE SCHOOL!
ANDY - HIS MOM TOOK HIM TO A ROD STEWART CONCERT AND HE WAS A HEAVY METAL GUY. HIS METAL FRIENDS TEASED HIM ABOUT IT.
PATRICK - HIS MOM GOT HIM A GI JOE FOR HIS BIRTHDAY, STASHED IT IN A CLOSET AND FORGOT ABOUT IT UNTIL HE HAD HIS FIRST GIRL-BOY PARTY AT AGE 13. MOM FOUND THE G I JOE DOLL, WRAPPED IT UP AND GAVE IT TO HIM IN FRONT OF THE GIRLS.
LATE ENTRY FROM HALL OF FAME LISTENER: OMAR - MOM WAS TOO DRUNK TO DRIVE SO SHE ASKED OMAR FOR A RIDE HOME ON NEW YEAR'S EVE HE DIDN'T WANT TO DO, BUT FINALLY GAVE IN.. HE WENT TO THE TROLLEY STATION TO PICK HER UP AND SAW A MAJOR POLICE ACTION HAPPENING. A NAKED WOMAN WAS WALKING DOWN THE TROLLEY TRACK - IT WAS HIS MOM. COPS TOOK HER TO JAIL! HE PICKED HER UP THE NEXT DAY.
****WINNER****** IT WAS A UNANIMOUS VOTE FOR TOM - HE WENT TO OVER THE LINE AT AGE 10 WITH HIS MOM. THERE WAS A FOOT-LONG HOTDOG CONTEST FOR GIRLS TO SEE HOW FAR DOWN THEIR THROATS THEY COULD GO WITHOUT LEAVING TEETH MARKS. MOM WON AND GOT A TROPHY!
WOULD YOU RATHER YOUR MOM SENT YOU NUDE PICS OF HERSELF OR HAVE HER GET THE TROPHY FOR WINNING THE FOOT LONG HOT DOG CONTEST?
Photo by KGB/iHeartMedia
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The bands Judas Priest and Deep Purple were in San Diego last night and Emily's hard rockin' husband was desperate to see them. Half an hour before the show, he scored an extra ticket and begged Emily to go with him - all the way to the South Bay on a school night. She did not want to go - not even a little bit. So no one went to the concert! He enjoys doing everything together as a family and refused to go without her. We mostly didn't understand that, but oh well. We know some women would die to have their husbands want to spend all their time together - but we're different, I guess.
Speaking of concerts, please stop sending Dave your concert videos taken on your phone from the 80th row of the venue! They're just awful and no one really wants to see that.
Photos by Getty Images
TODAY WE TOOK "THE DICK QUIZ" WRITTEN BY LISTENER DJ JOHNNY ROX. THE ANSWER WILL HAVE EITHER PETER, DICK, JOHNSON OR WANG IN IT.
THIS DICK COMES ALIVE - PETER FRAMPTON
GEORGE W’S DICK - DICK CHENEY
DICK THAT PUTTS - DUSTIN JOHNSON
DICK THAT DRIVES - DICK TRICKLE
ANGRY ELF DICK - PETER DINKLAGE
DIRECTED THE HOBBIT DICK - PETER JACKSON
BEATLE DICK - RICHARD STARKEY (RINGO)
SLEDGE HAMMER DICK - PETER GABRIEL
THE OTHER BEATLE DICK - PETE BEST
LEGENDARY AFRICAN AMERICAN STAND UP COMEDIAN DICK - RICHARD PRYOR
CARTOON FAMILY’S FAT DAD - PETER GRIFFITH
PRETTY WOMAN’S RICH DICK - RICHARD GERE
COCK EYED, TRENCH COAT WEARING TV DICK - PETER FALK
DICK ON JAWS - RICHARD DREYFUSS
MONKEY DICK - PETER TORK
ACTOR, WRESTLER- DICK - DWAYNE JOHNSON
SUPER BOWL MVP CHEATING DICK - RICHARD SHERMAN
KISS DICK - PETER CRISS
NAKED GAY DICK SURVIVOR - RICHARD HATCH
EVERYONE LOVES RAYMOND’S DAD’S DICK - PETER BOYLE
BILLIONAIRE BRITISH VIRGIN - RICHARD BRANSON
PINK PANTHER DICK - PETER SELLERS
DESIGNER LADY DICK - VERA WANG
ENDLESS SUMMER NIGHTS DICK - RICHARD MARX
CINCINNATI’S DISGRACED DICK - PETE ROSE
EIGHT IS ENOUGH DICK - DICK VAN PATTEN
FUZZY GREEN BALL WHACKING DICK - PETE SAMPRAS
BIG UNIT BALL THROWING DICK - RANDY JOHNSON
AMBIGUOUS GAY SWEATY DICK - RICHARD SIMMONS
80’S MIAMI DICK - DON JOHNSON
SPORTSCASTER DICK FOR COLLEGE BASKETBALL - DICK VITALE
OTHER SPORTSCASTER DICK - DICK ENGBERG
DICK WITH 16 CANDLES - LONG DUCK DONG
TONY DICK NY CONGRESSMAN - ANTHONY WEINER
DOWN ON THE WATERFRONT - ROD STEIGER
GREATEST DICK OF ALL TIME - HENRY WADSWORTH LONGFELLOW
*************************EMILY WINS********
LATER ON, A LISTENER CALLED IN WITH GOAT OF ALL DICKS - HER HUSBAND - DICK ALLCOCK!!
Photo by KGB/iheartmedia
Please enjoy today's podcast of our entire show on KGB for 9-27-18.