TMZ says guitarist Slash and his wife of 17 years, Perla, have finalized their divorce. While Slash only got to keep his guitars, the house in Beverly Hills, and his F-150 pickup; his wife made out like a bandit. Perla gets $6.6 million cash, plus $100,000 per month in spousal support and $39,000 per month in child support. Perla also gets a house in LA, a Range Rover, two Mercedes and custody of the kids. The kids get .09% of Slash's income for the next 20 years.
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Did you get suckered into buying one of those vaginal jade eggs from Gwyneth Paltrow's website, Goop? If so, you can get your money back. Her company has agreed to pay back $145,000 for making false medical claims about the eggs. Goop claimed if you put the jade egg into your vagina, you could balance your hormones, regulate your menstrual cycle and increase bladder control. There were no scientific facts to back that up that claim.
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Here are some of the things we learned today.
We started the show playing "Which bitch stole the other bitches look?" Dave or Emily? He claims he's dressed like a chick today. Dave asked Cookie if he'd rather dress like one of the chicks or like Boyer? Cookie exclaimed, "the chicks!"
Emily's husband Rico Suave has been such a good boy - she gave him a huge reward at Costco and let him buy an "Instant Pot" pressure cooker type thing and a new blankie. Rico says that kitchen appliance has changed his life! She made it sound so good - Sarah and Ruthie want one too.
Kaaboo Del Mar is planning to boost security for its weekend of concerts, food, comedy and art. They will be using metal detectors, thanks to the shooting over Labor Day weekend at the Ice Cube concert.
One lame individual had sex with an injured beaver - which killed it. A good samaritan was trying to rescue the beaver in WA state when she decided to drive home to get a box for it. When she returned, she saw the disheveled man laying next to it and figured out pretty quickly what happened. The dope got arrested and is being held without bail. He's being charged with first-degree animal cruelty and possession of meth.
And that led to Dave's brand new band name, “BEAVERS ON METH."
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The Rev. Dave, a real priesty guy, held a round of Lash Wednesday today. He generously gave away tickets to The KGB Sky Show AND Kaaboo Del Mar! Listener Sue was the sin, sinniest, sinner of them all and took home the concert tickets. She went on a group trip down south and got mad when one of the whores flirted with the guy she liked. When the girl dropped her drawers to pee in the desert, Sue pushed her over - right into a cactus. She ended up pulling cactus needles out of her squish mitten for the duration of the trip.
Golden State Warriors champion, Steph Curry was asked to name his Mt. Rushmore of the best, all-time, players in the NBA. He obviously started with himself, but also named Kyrie Irving from the Boston Celtics, LA Laker, Magic Johnson and Pistol Pete Maravich. I'm sure George Washington was enough of a narcissist to throw his own name in the hat when the decision was made who would be on Mt. Rushmore.
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Dave had a haircut yesterday and says he always talks to his stylist about their favorite TV shows. She wondered if he's watching "The Staircase" on Netflix. It's a did-he-do-it-or-not from a popular Dateline episode, now stretched into eight shows. It's the new version of "The Making of a Murderer" where a man is accused of pushing his wife down the stairs and killing her. The stylist said they never really tell you if he did it or not, so Dave can't be bothered with it. He says he won't watch it because he doesn't want to have to decide the ending. He's wants to be entertained and told how it ends.
Please enjoy our free podcast of today's show on KGB!